A Moment in Nature
Tiferet Movement Wilderness Retreat
I always experienced nature as the go-to connective space in my consciousness. I grew up on a farm in Massachusetts. My back yard (behind the chicken coop) consisted of miles of forest to explore Indian relics and secret gardens. I was taught from a young age, that nature was our religion. It was the answer to our existential questions. Certainly, NOT Judaism. Being Jewish was about food, guilt, and weirdness... which we had been born into, of no choice of our own. Nature was the place of wholeness being and serenity. Worship of nature for its own sake would fill that emptiness in our souls. The religion of our parents and grandparents was antiquated and meant to be obliterated. My Jewish neshama was searching, for years for a place to fill the vacuous emptiness. Adventurous backpacking for weeks in the mountain ranges of the West Coast and Europe, rock climbing risky ropes, kayaking in daredevil canyons, were the thrill and goal of life. These are the places where I searched for chius (lifeforce) and truth. Even after I became Torah observant, I would still strive to escape to nature, as I was only being partially fulfilled with the lifestyle and frum culture presented to me for years. H-shem, in his kindness led me to pnimus Torah in the right time, only a few years ago. The Torah Chadasha, has led me finally fill the void, that all my life experiences hadn’t achieved successfully.
Enter Corona.
Corona, for me, has been defined by 4 months of deep isolation in a Manhattan apartment, not leaving or running anywhere; rather connecting to my family, appreciating the meaning of “bais”, learning Torah with my husband, chavrusas and chaburas, and being deeply involved in learning Elevation from Rav Doniel Katz and practicing, reviewing and dialoging with fellow students of the meaning of life under Covid … all under the scope and boundaries of what we have been learning in the Elevation. I hadn’t fully realized my intrinsic transformation until I left my cave and entered the forest, driving under an hour from my home… to a camp ground no less! And here I found myself in this idealistic setting.
It took me about 24 hours back to nature, to reach an Ah-ha moment.I am not feeling any differently here on this beautiful, lakeside, mountainous setting, as in my little apartment in the big Apple.
This was a total revelation for me. I no longer needed to feel deprived of nature; the necessity of nature to feel wholesome, pure, connected… One. It felt liberating.
I no longer have to commune with trees because I have the Eitz Chaim in the realm of Ayn Od Milvado. It’s all Him and He is part of me.
That reality has finally penetrated into my bones. It was no longer just words on a page, or lessons from a rabbi. Where I was situated in time or space had no impact on my core being because I am ALWAYS connected. Finally, coming back to home base. Completing the circle.
- With immense gratitude to my teachers and soul sisters for guiding me in this journey
Re: Corona
Women are emerging from their cocoons. I see the butterflies ready to fly. The conversation amongst the women is geuladik. Everyone’s trying to find meaning while emerging from corona which has not ended yet. The big question is how to not emerge as a caterpillar. Fearful of going back to “normal”. Rushing, racing unconsciousness. Everyone grasping to hold onto what they acquired in bidud. Connection to self, family, and Hashem. So wide open to listening to the messages to what do we do now?
-Rochel Leah Weiman
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“The Tiferet Wilderness Retreat was the most incredible convergence of neshamas in the most sublime exquisite experience. The soothing setting, the expansiveness of nature was like being held in H-shems outstretched hands in such a palpable way and the incredible beauty of that was that we were all individually on our own and yet collectively rendered into the presence of H-shem, letting Him guide us and move us organically through this healing moment in time. The high holy souls, seemingly coming from the same shoresh were connected for a really powerful resonance. We were able to tap into all the energy provides, deep within the forest and water. We were given the experience to round-out, solidify and acquire deep internal understanding of who we are. A validation of our essence, and a balancing of our elements, earth, water, wind, and fire within ourselves. We were hugged and kissed from above for the avoda we have done, these past 4 months, of corona. Each one of us has triumphed, and struggled and grappled, grown and clung with every bit of might and force to H-shem to say, “I am holding on to You. I am making it through this. I will be a light to those around me in this time, as everything crashes in, within and without, and within our worlds.”
We took our lights and our strengths and we shared them and they were received! We took our weaknesses and our struggles and we revealed all of their vulnerability and they were received. We were gifted with golden healing moments. We moved our bodies, internalized the dveikus deep down into a cellular awareness. We imprinted in our souls, this love, this validation and this deep internal knowing of where to go forward. None of this was in the program or the intention of the retreat. The intention of the retreat, created by Bracha, was “I am creating the environment for H-shem to do his magic. I am creating the open spaces and the opportunities to choose to accept surrender. For you to be held by H-shem and that’s all. She led with Hod. She knew when to apply Netzach and Hod but she led with Hod. She pulled back and let the nature and the beauty and the coalescence of these neshamas rise and do their thing. It was the most sublime, incredible exquisite inner and outer healing with lasting impressions. The powerful connections were made that I wasn’t even looking for. I was perfectly content to go sit inwards with myself and within nature, but It turned out to be a space of neshama connections like no other.”
-Rachel Leah Ismaili
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