Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh - Farbman
Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh Shiur #7
Zahava Farbman July 1, 2019
"Tzav comes from the word "Team"-
I thought the last time, personally, was a tremendous game changer, when we spoke about that "mitzvah" comes from the word "tzav," and "tzav" is not just "command" but also comes from the word "team"--as in, togetherness, to be with me.
It really depends on your consciousness and your mindfulness in your approach to the mitzvah. How are you approaching it? That you are being commanded to do it, or that you want to be together with Hashem? If it's because I want to be together with You, Hashem, then it's very likely and very helpful to help you engage in dveikus. As we've been saying nonstop, dveikus is really our tachlis. "Kirvas Elokim li tov," which we've been speaking so much about, joining the team. It's all about being on Hashem's team.
"Why don't our children learn this?"
I think that is the question not of the day but of the century. I don't think any of us learned this at all.
I don't know why she comes up with these things all the time, but I was having lunch with my 9-year old and--I don't know how it came up; I didn't even mention that conversation to her. It was mind-blowing. Basically, she and I ended up talking about this [topic]. My children know I talk about hisbodedus a lot, and she had brought up something about davening in school, how they have to daven out loud, and she said, "Ima, I talk to Hashem, and sometimes I'm just too tired to daven out loud." So, then we discussed talking to Hashem and connecting to Him, and why we do things, and Deborah Fliegelman's brachos, and she said to me, "How come we don't learn about this in school, Ima?" From the mouths of babes...
We have so many things in our lives, even talking to our children, or making Shabbos, or yomtov, it is so much in the way that we approach it; being mindful, it's all in your mind, in terms of how we do things. Is it a commandment, a tzav, or a tav, that we're doing it because we want to form a relationship? Think about how we talk to our children, or to our friends. [Think about] how we approach Shabbos: Am I preparing for Shabbos? Am I not doing a melachah on Shabbos because it's a commandment or because Hashem, I really want to connect to You?
"Tzivoi" is also a connection
@ I heard also that it [mitzvah] means "connection." A "tzivoi" is also a connection, so every time that you are doing a mitzvah, it's like the fiber-optic [cables]. Our neshamah is connected to Hashem through 613 strings, and every time we do a mitzvah, that string gets a little bit thicker, and the connection becomes that much stronger. That also explains the concept of "Ein tzaddik omeid bamakom baal teshuvah, an always-righteous person cannot stand in the place of one who has returned to observance." Because the string with which someone has done an aveirah, a sin, gets severed, but when they do teshuvah, when they repent--imagine: to reconnect a string that has broken, you have to make a knot, so now that neshamah is in a different place. [The person who has repented] becomes a different person. That's the whole concept of "Ein tzaddik omeid...."
The mitzvah offers that opportunity to keep growing our connection and keep elevating and making us that much more connected to Hashem. @
How to create Dveikus
Rav Schwartz says, the word tzav actually means "team." In order to be on Hashem's team, in order to create this togetherness--we were talking about how to create this dveikus. It's an automatic step; if I'm doing this mitzvah, Hashem, because ... sometimes, if you actually think it, if you think, "Hashem, I'm doing this mitzvah because I want to be close to You." What's the phrase, "Hareini [or, Hineini] muchan umezuman, Behold, I am prepared and willing to do this mitzvah..." Sometimes we do a mitzvah and we actually have in mind Hareini muchan umezuman. I think about my grandfather, a"h, who before he took a bite of chicken on Shabbos would say, "Lekovod Shabbos kodesh essen..., in honor of the holy Sabbath, I am eating." It wasn't like he was eating chicken during the week. No, it was lekovod Shabbos kodesh. He had that in mind. It was a part of his consciousness.
If we start to get used to that, [to thinking or saying'" I'm doing this mitzvah because I want to be close to You, Hashem." It's a total game changer. We keep going back to Deborah Fliegelman and her brachos. It's not enough for her to just make a brachah, she says she is making this brachah because she wants to be close to Hashem.
Grocery shopping can become like that
Anything can become like that. Rivky Winehouse was sitting next to me last week, and she said that sometimes she feels as though she gets so caught up in the Shabbos preparations, the yomtov preparations, the cooking, the baking, the shopping. But if you have in mind, "I am now going shopping so that I can make a beautiful Shabbos." Or, "so that I can make dinner for my children." Everything can be uplifted. Michal Horowitz talks about how she likes to take power walks. Before she starts, she says, "I am now doing this so that I can perform the mitzvah of taking care of myself so that I can serve You better, Hashem."
That creates a dveikus, because everything that I am doing is in order to be connected to You, closer to You.
Kirvas Elokim
Yud-Alef, paragraph Yud.
"קרבת אלקים לי טוב". זה אינו ענין של ידע או אימרה, אלא זו מציאות החיים. זה אינו ענין ששייך רק לחג הפסח או לחג השבועות או לחג סוכות. אלא זהו ענין ששייך לכל רגע ורגע מחיי האדם ממש. שס"ה ימים בשנה, כ"ד שעות ביממה (למי שזוכה להיות דבוק בבורא גם בזמן שנתו) וס' דקות בשעה. זו כל מציאות האדם, להיות קרוב לבורא ודבוק בו, "קרבת אלקים לי טוב". בודאי שבכדי לחיות בצורה זו, צריך דרך ברורה בעבודת ה', כיצד מגיעים לכך להיות דבוקים בבורא ית"ש בכל רגע ורגע ממש. אולם עוד לפני שנבאר את הדרך לכך, ראשית צריך שיהיה ברור לאדם בירור גמור שאין בו צל של ספק כלל, מהו תכלית חייו. צריך שיהיה ברור לאדם שתכלית החיים היא להיות קרוב ודבוק לבורא ית"ש בכל רגע ורגע ממש. דבקות פנימית בכל נימי הנפש ממש. כלומר, לפני שנתחיל לחפש ולבאר את הדרך לכך, מוכרח שתחילה יהיה ברור לחלוטין איזה דרך אנחנו מחפשים, לאן אנו רוצים שדרך זו תוביל אותנו. ולכך ברור הדבר, שצריך ברירות גמורה בתכלית, שהיא "קרבת אלקים לי טוב". זו הנקודה שכל יחיד ויחיד צריך לברר לו בירור גמור, עד שירגיש בנפשו ממש שנקודה זו של תכלית החיים ברורה לו בצורה שאין בה Being close to you, Hashem. That's what it's all about. It's not just a slogan, a tagline. It's not just another piece of important information for us to know. It's the reality of life; it's real living.
It's the reality of life, it's real living, to be considered really alive is kirvas Elokim.
זה אינו ענין ששייך רק לחג הפסח או לחג השבועות או לחג It's not something, just a detail you need to know for one of the holidays. It's not just like, oh, by the way, it's good to feel close to Hashem.
But rather, this is our life-support every single second, and the more that we are willing to be vulnerable and really admit and realize that this is our life-support, and accept the reality of real living, then the more we are going to start to feel really alive. But, not necessarily at the beginning. I can certainly tell you, from myself, that I definitely feel that that's the truth.
The mitzvos / Tzava are our companions
… but also related to tzava, companion. The mitzvos we do are our companions in Olam Haba and also make us the companion of Hashem, or make Him our companion. Key word: vulnerable, which brings us to recognize how vital kirvas Hashem is, and then from there is growth, b'ezras Hashem.
Team / togetherness / companion. It's all connected
They are all related to the same thing: team, togetherness, companion. It's all connected. What you just said now, "The key word is vulnerable"--1000%. A thousand, thousand, thousand percent. This is a conversation some of us have had. Sherri Mandell is an American who made Aliyah many, many, many years ago. She was always a writer. Her son Coby cut school one day and was hiking with a friend and was killed by terrorists in a cave. Sherry wrote two amazing books, The Blessing of a Broken Heart and The Road to Resilience. She uses a lot of Hebrew language; I love her work.
One of the things she says is that the word "vulnerable" comes from the Latin word "wound." To be vulnerable is to let it out, to be able to expose our wounds and be able to say to Hashem, "This is me; this is who I am; You created me, You know my strengths and my weaknesses--these are my wounds, yet here I am. I want to be close to You, I need to be close to You, I want to be on Your team, I need You to be my companion." It is putting yourself in a vulnerable place. It is saying, "Hashem, You are my Creator; You know me best. I want to expose myself to You, I need to expose myself to You; I need Your help."
Radical Acceptance (RW)
I think maybe for that reason, when we first engage in this type of acceptance, we start to think about the fact that we might actually need this to be the reality of living. Maybe it doesn't feel so good.
It doesn't feel good to open up yourself to people. It's not easy to have an open wound but once you take care of it and give help to it, it does get better. The same with vulnerability--after you open up once, it gets easier to do it again.@
Yes, but we're talking about with Hashem.
@: After you open up to Hashem once, and you make it...I know from experience, the first few times I [spoke to Hashem] it was weird, but you say "Hashem, this is what I want to talk to You about," and it just gets easier, it's not awkward anymore.
Where the vulnerability really comes in.
The vulnerability also comes to the place where I know that I have no control. That's the bring-me-to-my-knees place of "It's only You Who has control," and that's the real vulnerability, because we work in this world as if we have control, as if we can manipulate, and really, at the end of the day, all we are doing is nothing. That's where the vulnerability really comes in.
That's the hard part, to understand that and to let go of your control. It's also, why do I have to tell Him that I'm feeling this? He knows my feelings! He gave this to me! You have to say, just like you have to tell [another person your feelings even though they may be aware of them].
I think the telling is for us, to get to the realization that we don't have control, because we're so busy feeling that it is only for us. It's not even to tell Hashem the feeling, it's to get into the depths of "I don't have control." That's really what it's about. The same thing with praising Hashem: it's not because Hashem needs my praise, it's for me to realize the good that I have in my life.… it's a matter of making yourself vulnerable. For what we are talking about here, Rav Schwartz is trying to hammer into our heads that this is supposed to be on our minds all the time. As we are getting into that zone, at first [we worry], if I am not thinking about it, it becomes almost threatening, until you find your place in it. It's almost--not a burden, but a concern: "I need to fit this into my life." Rav Schwartz is going to help us do that.
@ I think what was said about not being in control--that is the scary part. You have opened yourself up to that raw place @: Then who has control? The same One Who had control the whole time!
Yes, maskim, agreed, it's vulnerable, it's scary, we don't have control. But, this is a big but, the more you connect to Hashem and the more you feel as though you have this relationship and conversation and communication going on with Hashem, you feel --speaking for myself--I feel much more confident, taken care of, an ability to come and say that, "Ok Hashem, I'm going into this situation, I totally know that I have no control, and I need You to help guide me. I have total confidence that You will put me where You need me to be and You will take care of me."
@P: That's when you don't have the control, then you develop the next level, which is the trust. The raw part is the lack of control.
We're talking about the first step. I just didn't want to leave it as scary. There's hope!
@P: The next step, when you are working on that relationship, is trust. It's like when you take your kids to the dentist. They know that it's not going to be a good experience, but they understand that it's a purposeful one and that there will be a good outcome, and they hope the dentist will be able to do their whole mouth in one visit and they will never have to go back again. It's the same thing with our relationship with Hashem, when we realize we have no control, so we realize it's all purposeful and it's all going to be good. But it's about our relationship; Hashem is not our waiter in a restaurant where we tell him the number on the menu and tell him exactly how we want it cooked. @
Right, but that doesn't happen until you have that relationship.
@P: Until you first give up the control. Ground Zero is giving up control, I think Even before that. Everyone here, everyone listening, is hopefully at that point, because they are wanting to build a sanctuary in their heart, they are learning Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh. The first date, almost, is wanting to get to know Him, wanting to be on His team, wanting His companionship.
@P: The raw place is where the healing begins. The sooner you start the less healing you have to do.
@P: Sometimes Hashem puts you in a situation or brings in a challenge just so that you can let go of that control and come to trust Him. So many times, I was --not fighting with Hashem, but thinking, "This cannot happen, this cannot happen." I would fight the issue at hand, and then at a certain point I would see that things are not going my way, and at the second that I would let go and say "Ok Hashem, it's in Your hands, then things would start going better. It could be He just wanted to see my trust.
P: That was the whole Midbar, that's all Hashem wants, just for us to trust Him, come to the Land, I'll feed you, but we just kept "but"-ing Him. Yes, He created the world in 6 days but I don't think He can feed me. And we keep doing that. We didn't learn. Yet
We're trying. basically, 60 minutes every hour, 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, this is our reality. Being close to Hashem and clinging to Him, kirvas Elokim li tov.
'בודאי שבכדי לחיות בצורה זו, צריך דרך ברורה בעבודת
We need a seder in our avodas Hashem
Now we are going to start [to discuss] how we are doing this. Obviously, to live like this we need a seder in our avodas Hashem, a plan for serving G-d. Remember in the first few classes we spoke about this seder. If it will be tangible, will we make it a reality, then we need a derech brurah, a clear guide, a clarity. I know some personalities need 1,2,3--give me rules. We need to define for ourselves what kirvas Elokim, closeness to Hashem, means so that we know for ourselves what that seder brurah means. For some of us, it means when we are feeling low, we need instructions as to how to feel better. For some of us it means, we work in a very secular environment and we need that seder brurah to feel kirvas Elokim even though I am not surrounded by Jews, not in a Jewish environment. For some of us it means I am not in a marriage that I think is ok for me, my children have challenges I never would have imagined, I have financial difficulties, an illness, a this, a that. I am dealing with situations that I never thought You, Hashem, would give to me, so I need a seder brurah, I need those guidelines in terms of how to feel about kirvas Elokim.
What am I building? What do I need for myself? We decided that kirvas Elokim was important. We decided that dveikus for Hashem is the tachlis, but I need the seder brurah for myself. How is kirvas Elokim looking for me?
כיצד מגיעים לכך להיות דבוקים בבורא ית"ש בכל רגע ורגע ממש. אולם עוד לפני שנבאר את הדרך לכך, ראשית צריך שיהיה ברור לאדם בירור גמור שאין בו צל של ספק כלל, מהו תכלית
How does one reach a place to have kirvas Elokim every second?
First, we have to explain how we are going to build that way. I know we've said it many times before, but he is saying it again. First, we have to be crystal clear about what the purpose of our life is. He said it a lot. Why? Why does he have to keep stressing it? We say something, we take about an inch forward, and then he goes back. That's what it feels like. One step forward, two steps back. Why does he have to keep stressing it? He's saying it because we think that we are so clear about the purpose of our life, we are having a great day and we're clear about our life's purpose, but then we may have a crisis, we may have a safeik, a doubt, we may have this nisayon, this challenge that comes our way. We might have this wind that blows down the foundation that we've worked so hard the last few weeks to build, so we have to start again and ask ourselves, "Is this the real me? Is this really what I want? I spent a lot of time building, and then this nisayon came my way, and is this really my purpose? Am I clear on this?"
He's reminding us now, as we are still in the beginning of building. Which, if you think about it, is brilliant. As we are still in the beginning stages, as we are still pouring the cement, he is reminding us: "Dveikus! Dveikus! Kirvas Elokim! Kirvas Elokim!" So that hopefully as the building gets stronger and stronger it will be so strong in this.
What must be so clear for us? This is a very interesting point. Where do we want this path to lead us? We keep talking about dveikus to Hashem, and kirvas Elokim, but where exactly do we want it to take us? Rav Shlomo quoted a Chazal (in English): "The path upon which you want to embark is what you will be led on."
We're clear about the dveikus, but just thinking a bit in terms of the next step, because we are all eager to jump ahead.
Where is your Ratzon?
Where do we want it to take us? Where are we going with this? We have to have a vision of where it is going to go. My husband and I always laugh because my husband is not a visionary. When we saw this house, it was a small house on a big lot and I was very anxious to move to this neighborhood. We saw this house and my husband was like, no thanks. I said, Use your imagination. I was pushing. He said, It's a small run-down house. I said, Use your vision! We're going to go places! Baruch Hashem, he humored me....
We have to have vision. We might not have the full dveikus right now, but imagine, one day I'm going to be more, I'm going to grow more, where do I want to be in my life? I know people who used guided imagery to help them do this. I know kids who play with virtual reality. Those types of things. These are key essential elements in building a building. I needed my vision in order to build this house. If you don't have that, then you are not going to get anywhere. We need utmost clarity regarding the purpose, which is again, kirvas Elokim li tov.
זו הנקודה שכל יחיד ויחיד צריך לברר לו בירור גמור, עד שירגיש בנפשו ממש שנקודה זו של תכלית החיים ברורה לו בצורה שאין בה ספק
On an individual level, this is very important, because every individual has something to be shared, to be investigated on the deepest level until a person feels in his own nefesh, his soul, on an absolute 1000% level. What he is going to say soon, which I very much appreciate, is that on a general level, kirvas Elokim is for everybody, but how we are each going to get there is going to be very individual, which is very, very important. If we think about how, in terms of loving our children or loving our friends.
@P: I just want to say that the vision he is talking about with virtual reality--there is a vision that Hashem has when He created us. Sometimes it is hard for us to see ourselves as that. We think we are too small; we think we are not enough, not smart enough, not good enough, not beautiful enough, not anything enough, and we limit ourselves with that vision. So if we can connect to Hashem?] and really have that dveikus, it's partly growing our own vision. As you said, when you saw that house, you thought, we can do this, we can do that; it was so much more than what you see with your eyes. We too are so much more than what we see with our limited vision. So if we allow Hashem's vision in, I think it becomes more of a possibility, more of a reality. To be the bigger self. Maybe it's scary to be that
100%. I think sometimes we have our own vision of what should be or what needs to be and the ability to have that bittul and say, maybe I'm wrong, maybe my vision is wrong and my life is not supposed to be exactly the way I envisioned it. That takes a lot of emunah. But I think you're right.
@ It can take a lifetime to recognize Hashem's vision of and for us.
That is 100% true. It's a lifetime avodah.
If a person made it clear to himself that the purpose of his life is to be close to Hashem, kirvas Elokim li tov, might start seeming to him that in order to be close to Hashem that you need to separate yourself and be removed from everything You should know that this is a thought coming from the yetzer hara, so we can be a little relieved from that, it's not true that we have to remove ourselves from everything and everyone, the yetzer hara is trying to distance us from the emes, the truth, from things that we think are important. and therefore to be present, to know-- the yetzer hara basically comes and paints an image of being close to Hashem as being black, [as necessitating that we] cut ourselves off from everything and everybody, and not allowing us to have anything else in our lives
בצורה שכביכול זו דרך רק ליחידי סגולה, אבל לאדם כמותו אין מה לדבר על
Zehirus to Ruach Hakodes
The yetzer hara says that what you learned is just for great people, just for tzaddikim, but someone like you is for sure not. We know, as we've said here before, the Baal Shem Tov taught us that every single one of us is zocheh to, merits, a connection to Hashem. that a mitzvah brings the next mitzvah. He starts with the lowermost level. He starts with Zehirus, alacrity, and he goes all the way up to Ruach Hakodesh, divine inspiration. Rav Itamar Schwartz bases a lot [of this sefer] on Mesillas Yesharim, he actually wrote a peirush, a commentary, on Mesillas Yesharim, and he is going to show us that so too, with our dveikus Hashem, he is starting us here on the lowest level and working us up. He's bringing a rayah, a proof, just like
in Mesillas Yesharim how they start from Zehirus and work their way up. He's showing that mitzvah goreres mitzvah, one mitzvah leads to another, and we have to do what is attainable for us--we don't start with learning about techiyas hameisim, the revival of the dead, we don't start learning at the loftiest levels. Just like Mesillas Yesharim, Chazal set it up for us very clearly, step by step, going from one thing to another.
He is also bringing in here, to remind us, to show us emunas tzaddikim, to trust Chazal. Mesillas Yesharim is based on a [statement of] Chazal, it is set up very clearly, they are not expecting us to go from zero to 60. [Rav Schwartz is] trying to do the same thing for you here in terms of the dveikus, in terms of building this binyan. Maybe that is why he is reminding us of it every five seconds.
@P: Also, because in [building] a house, there is an order to do things. You have to pour the foundation first, etc. Maybe that's why he talking about Mesillas Yesharim, there's an order to get to that place of Ruach Hakodesh. There are the steps. You can't go out of order. You can't start with Zerizus, you have to start with Zehirus. So too with Bilvavi. He's about to go into the steps. He says you have to go in order. You can't read the end of the book first and say you're going to get it all because you read the last chapter. @
He's saying basically here that he didn't tell us in this book every single principle of attaining piety, and it's pashut, it's simple, why not. Because every person is involved in their own personal lives, every person has their own specific set of circumstances, their situations, and they need their specific guidance. On a klal level, we all need general guidance in terms of how to build this binyan. But that doesn't answer every single person's different set of circumstances. We need to trust ourselves and to trust that that will come later. Right now, we are learning what is good for everybody in terms of dveikus, and it will come later on in the book how to apply this to every single individual.
There are people who sit and learn all day, and there are people who go out and work all day. Each person, depending on what they are doing, depending on their job, has a different way of expressing their kirvas Elokim.
Rav Schwartz says, he wrote us a whole book, however, he is not going to finish the whole book in telling us that this mitzvah leads to that mitzvah, because you might then still feel lacking. He says, there is a whole mystery, and that mystery is called you. Each one of us is an individual, and finding that mystery called you in your avodas Hashem, your own expression in avodas Hashem, trusting it and believing it and knowing what is right for you, and knowing how you need to tune into your avodas Hashem, how you need to express that dveikus to Hashem. For you, that is your tachlis. Meaning, everyone has the same tachlis of dveikus to Hashem. That we know. That's everyone's tachlis. But how each of us is going to express that dveikus, is for each of us to explore.
There is no right way and no wrong way to feel or think or cope or react to any situation
Hopefully, through this book, he is going to teach us how to explore. I keep saying different reasons why I love this book. This is another reason why. If any of you know me through my work in crisis and trauma, you know I believe very strongly that there is no right way and no wrong way to feel or think or cope or react to any situation. I believe the same way in terms of our avodas Hashem. I believe the same way in terms of our tefillah. Some of you may know that I have presented on Shaarim BaTefillah together with Michal Horowitz, which is based on that yesod, that principle. Shaarim BaTefillah is an amazing sefer by Rav Shimshon Pincus that goes through ten gates of prayer. I believe it is Hashem sending a message to us. It's based on a [statement of] Chazal; it's Hashem saying to us, "You're going through a hard time. I gave you a nisayon. You're having a hard time connecting to the words in the siddur right now?
Here's at least 10 different ways to try to connect. Tza'akah, scream at me. Sha'avah, scream inside your heart and know that only I can hear you. Cry, that's a form of prayer. Fall down, that's a form of prayer. There's no right or wrong way to approach Hashem. Find your way. Approach Me. I want you to approach Me; I am here. I will take you any way you want to come to Me.
Rav Schwartz is just validating that point. He's empowering us and telling us, yes, the most important thing in the world is dveikus to Hashem. The most important thing is kirvas Elokim li tov. But how you do it is up to you to figure out. Rav Schwartz wrote a book to help us figure it out. He's not just sending us out there. Rav Shimshon Pincus wrote a sefer with 10 different ways. He's not just telling us to find our way to approach G-d. He will help us find our way. But we are each an individual. Our relationships to Hashem are each different. Our personalities, our expressions, our situations, our life circumstances--that's the way Hashem made us. Hashem did not make a world of clones. He made each of us very, very differently, and He doesn't expect us or want us to serve Him in the exact same way. Yes, we each have the same siddur and we each have the same tefillos and we each have the same 613 mitzvos, yes, 1000%. But our self-expression, our individual expression, our individual relationships with Hashem, that will be different.
I love that he says that.
@P: I'm reading a book called One by Rabbi Kluger-It's amazing! He says in the book that Hashem's greatest pleasure is when we come to Him and He sees in us the...that every single one of us, we are so different that one of the biggest praises that we can give Hashem is to talk to Him so that He can talk, because through our expression, we realize that we are so unique from the other person that in a sense it is like a praise to Hashem that He created such different individuals. If you think about it, everything is in the same place, the eyes and the nose etc., but everybody looks so different. Inside, how much more so. If He had wanted to, He could have created a world of us all being the same, but He bedavka, specifically, did not. And there's a reason why.
This is our seventh shiur, and we've been hearing--and we're going to continue hearing, I'm not saying we won't hear any more about dveikus and kirvas Elokim li tov, and yes, it is our tachlis, it's for everybody, but to finally hear that we will each be doing it in our own way, I think is validating, refreshing, liberating, exciting, allows for individuality. Yet he's going to give us guidelines and then we're going to figure out how to apply them for ourselves.
This mashal, parable, when you talk about an orchestra, so many different instruments. In the orchestra, when we talk about individuality, I was just thinking about this magnificent orchestra and how if you don't have one of the 10 violinists, the orchestra sounds completely different. Whenever we talk about individuality and how every expression is needed, to me that is such a tangible way to think about it. If you don't have the drums, you don't have a good wedding band. You just really need every instrument in order to play. That's the mashal for the Jewish people. We are diverse and that's special and that's what makes us special.
Zahava Farbman soulsisters@ateresshimon.org